Broken

So many times I have called to you
How can I show you I care?
And how many times can my heart be broken
This love, I’m not sure I can bear
Reality tells me I’m wasting my time
Over and over again
Can’t you heal this ache that is mine
Killing me with this pain
Echoing voices that fill my head
Redemption comes at a cost
Hope is crushed as dreams are shed
Inside me all is lost

It seems to me that nothings real
This world just cannot be
A judgement made with no appeal
A cell door without a key
Locked inside my nightmare
A maze inside my head
Looking for somewhere, anywhere
Where I can feel instead
Numbed by life, by circumstance
Accusing thoughts I’ve never spoken
Paranoia does it’s happy dance
But I am left alone and broken

They lie beneath

In this place where blood was spilled
A place where many men were killed
Each fighting for a dishonourable cause
Where some distant lord will take applause
And count his coin with sweating hands
The price of death in foreign lands
Paid by the blood of fighting men
Who never returned to home again
Their bones restless in unfamiliar ground
Thrown together in a burial mound
No mourners there to vent their grief
Grass grows on the soil they lie beneath

But still there are those that mourn
In the places they were born
Where streets of smoke deny the day
And candles burn to light the way
Where some still weep and some still wait
Unable to comprehend their fate
Time sheds hope like a tree sheds leaves
Some live now only in their memories
As the world moves on they are left behind
Still searching for a love they cannot find
No tombstones stand, no flowers or wreath
Grass grows on the soil they lie beneath

Insanity (fiction)

Recorded interview with suspect suspected of serial killing.

It’s all lies (he declared)
Not a word of it is true
I never met her, (he despaired)
Now what do I do?
Ok, we met on a dating site
Her picture looked great
Exchanging messages each night
Staying up really late
She told me that she maybe thought
She was falling in love with me
I’m not the relationship sort
So I let her down lightly
She started messaging me every night
Texting me throughout the day
Telling me it wasn’t right
Dumping her that way
Telling me she won’t let go
That she would come to me
That she would let the whole world know
That we were meant to be
I admit that I was worried
My head in a bit of a whirl
I mean I’m hardly going to be bullied
By a little slip of a girl
And anyway she was bluffing, right?
There’s a thousand miles in between
She was hardly going to jump on a flight
For someone she never seen

Well I don’t know, I can’t say
What went through her head
To wind up in my drive way
With a bullet through her head
Did she know that I was wed?
Ouch! It was just a bit of fun
I guess I might not have said
Well what would you have done?
You think your so perfect?
You cops are all the same
What happened to serve and protect?
Too quick to apportion blame
I don’t know how she’s known
Exactly where I live
I don’t tell them about this home
That’s info I don’t give
Them? Did I say them? I meant her
Just a slip of the tongue
I don’t use chat rooms regular
It’s just the occasional one..

So now you know who she is
That’s good news I guess
A what! A private detective?
Hell, what a mess
So she was tracking me?
I can’t say I’m delighted
I’ve done nothing that I can see
To attract the attention shes invited
I don’t admire your policeman wiles
I can hardly be a suspect
What do you mean from her files
She had no files, I checked
Why? she was lying in front of me
I checked she wasn’t alive
If she had any bags I’d see
Them scattered on the drive!
The USB in her pocket
What the hell is one of those
Oh, the drive thing that plugs in a socket
Handy I suppose

Well I guess then you can arrest me
The Lord Satan is on my side
He made me take all those woman
And made them all my bride
And when they wouldn’t believe
Everything the Lord told through me
Though it meant we had to grieve
They had to be punished, you see
I found them through a chat room
Made sure they didn’t live near
Like a flower to my Lord they’d bloom
And soon cast off all fear
They were soon eager to request
The messenger of the Lord
To join with him in his quest
And get their just reward

What detective? Oh, The dead one
Lying on my drive
If she thought to check her facts
She would still be alive
Sadly for her safety
She managed to connect
But she was far to hasty
To chase her suspect
The Lord Satan did smite her hard
With my colt 45
If she’d been on her guard
Maybe she’d be still alive
They always believe
In their own immortality
And cannot perceive
Their life was bought to me
For HE demands a sacrifice
And I am his chosen sword
It’s an honour to fall under my knife
To be chosen for my Lord.

Slow

Everyone’s in such a hurry
They just can’t catch their breath
Filling their lives with worry
But they will worry themselves to death
Are their lives so derived
That they can’t just let things go
Sometimes you have to learn to put aside
And just take things slow

Everyone’s got an attitude
Everyone knows best
There’s no time for gratitude
There’s no time to rest
Everyone focussed on winning
Their legacy to bestow
Maybe the world should stop it’s spinning
And just take things slow

The Smile

In silence you lay, your final statement
Made without movement, without expression
Now beyond words, no last testament
To leave a lasting impression

Sightless eyes now unfocused and stilled
No longer seekers of light
There sparkling pupils of a life unfulfilled
Now gaze upon endless night

That’s perfect skin, once blushed with desire
Now pale and cold to the touch
No lovers touch can reignite that fire
Finally free from Aphrodites clutch

And still we wonder, of course we will
What pain that you couldn’t share?
What caused your beating heart to still?
That made life so hard to bear.

Sometimes I dream of you
Lying there in style
But one thing is different too
Your enigmatic smile

Intracerebral

Smell the smoke that stings his eyes
Voice’s reverberating
Images that truth belies
And the lies are intoxicating

Paranoiac vision’s spinning
Bouncing images in his head
Fights that he’s never winning
Waking sweating in his bed

Behind the curtain the shape of a person
Waiting his moment to fight
Inside his head the images worsen
As the knife blade catches the light

Under the bed a monster awaits
The wardrobe harbours an assassin
Inside his mind crashes alternate fates
As his sanity starts to unfasten

The knock on the door brings sweat to his brow
The telephone unplugged from the wall
He has lost all control and he doesn’t know how
To avoid the inevitable fall

Terrified of the night

I’m terrified of the night
Awakening in fear and confusion
Knowing something is not right
And living is a delusion
Reality is just out of sight
Just around the next corner
Where abandoned by the light
In the dark stands the mourner
The tears run down her face
For whom does she cry?
What memories does she chase
What nightmares does she deny?
In the night I feel the tears
I don’t understand the pain
The truth has changed over the years
But I still remain
Lost between the dark and the light
I’m terrified of the night

Bitter much?

Broken minds and damaged souls crying out for some release
Death and war, blood and pain, in a cycle that will not cease
Fanatical followers of imaginary creeds cause mayhem and despair
While governments make no attempts to protect the people in their care

Power and wealth and insidious stealth steal kingdoms and take control
While for the poor of a nation the constant starvation is taking it’s fatal toll
While at the top like pigs in a trough politicians wallow in their Ill gotten gains
Hiding their true nature by exaggerating their stature to support their political campaigns

The ministers men are talking again about how wonderful life would become
If we worked more for less and ignored the bad press in which they would soon succumb
Ones as bad as the other as each tries to smother his opponent in lies and misdirection
But no one is sure what’s the lie anymore, and even truth is a misconception

So the man in the street is struggling to keep the wolves away from the door
The cost of living is still unforgiving and everything that is needed cost more
We can’t pay the rent or the bills that we are sent, our future is looking cold and bleak
We are taxed to the core but they always want more, to keep us weary and weak

What remains unspoken maybe should not be said, he who is still unbroken is not so easily led
Those who are unbelievers are not without belief, and all of the deceivers steal truth like a thief
Though truth can be buried by a lie, obscured or deliberately underemployed
Stolen and misused or otherwise abused…it can never be destroyed.

Nightmare

Who closed the curtain?
Who cut off the light
Who was so certain
To block out the night?
What wanders out there
I don’t want to see?
Should I be aware
Is it coming for me?

The night trembles
The moon has gone
Dark disassembles
Battles not won
Clouds run to avoid
The fire in the sky
Artillery deployed
Bullets will fly

Death walks the walk
No one can evade
No time to talk
Under the blade
The music is done
Songs had its fill
The hand holds a gun
But no-one to kill

So open the curtain
And the world reborn
Landscape uncertain
Battered and torn
A nightmare you wake to
Cant get sleep from my head
Lies could be true
But Truth could be dead

A place to rest my head

Every day brings its promises
Every day brings its despair
When the sun rises and dismisses
The shadows lingering there

But the light cannot reach
The shadows around my heart
Walls of pain so hard to breech
Cannot be pulled apart

The promise is a day of heat
A warm sun beating down
But my soul is a rainy street
In the darker part of town

And promises are easily broken
And despair is a broken mind
Deepest thoughts are those least spoken
With wisdom hard to find 

So tell me truth of my resistance
Show me a way to dispel this dread
Give me a value to my existence 
And a place to rest my head